Parenting

When I first learned I was to be a parent, like many others, I was excited and nervous. To prepare myself, I absorbed books and videos on babies. I read about breastfeeding, nap schedules, colic, first aid and developmental milestones. I even went as far as to take courses offered by my hospital on baby care, breastfeeding, infant CPR, and labor and delivery. I had it covered, if I do say so myself. If I didn't know the answer then it could be found on my bookshelf or at the other end of a phone line.

I have come to realize recently that I had a narrow scope in my parenting education. Rightfully, I was concerned about my own abilities as a parent. I failed to consider the other aspects of parenthood: interacting with other parents and their children. In many cases it is a non-issue. However, I have stumbled across several outliers along the parenting distribution. One example that comes to mind is the Overly Competitive Mom (OCM).

The OCMs of the world are nuts. Yes, it is that simple. Just recently on a play date an OCM threatened her child with going home if he did not show off his latest word acquisition, or perform on command. According to her, this tactic is fine because she threatens him like this all the time. That did not seem to make sense to me but maybe that was because I was in shock. I was not prepared for her forceful parenting style nor for her need to feel superior through her child's accomplishments. I worried how this dialogue effected her son as well as my own. Will he think I may be this demanding? Will he think this is normal? How can I avoid this person... forever?

Perhaps I need to revisit the library. Hopefully, there will be a book or DVD entitled "How to Deal with Other Parents Who are Nuts" or "Keep the Crazies at Bay: Avoiding OCMs." In the meantime, I'm not answering my phone.

Hats

I would like to see more men wear hats. No, not stocking caps for cold weather or basball caps, though these have their place, sometimes that place is in the trash. I would like men to wear hats that look like they paused a moment, pondered, and selected a particular hat for a reason other than covering bed head or to support their favorite sports teams.

Why don't men wear real hats anymore? Some say that the decline of the hat fashion began when President John F. Kennedy went to his inauguration hatless. However, maybe it has more to do with laziness. I do not think many men want to be bothered with the extra step of selecting a hat to match their clothes, coat, or style. Oh, and then there is the added step of removing the hat indoors, a step baseball caps do not seem to need anymore. Believe it or not, there is actually laziness beyond the baseball cap. Consider the frayed brim baseball cap (the ones you actually buy pre-frayed, perhaps a cousin to the pre-ripped jeans). Some men can not be bothered to put forth the dedication involved in wearing a baseball cap so much that the brim frays. Which is surprising since they tend to get a lot of wear indoors and out.

Hats used to define a man's status. What happened to the Fedora? That is a fine hat with some style. What does the Fedora say about a man's status compared the the frayed baseball cap, store frayed or otherwise? I am not going to say it, you can judge for yourself. However, I am going to urge men to wear Fedoras. Toss laziness aside and bring real hats back in style!

Hot Dogs Made Easy

The other day while shopping in the grocery store my husband and I stumbled upon the epitome of meal laziness. Now, keep in mind that we can be pressed for time just as much as the next family. We have Morning Star Grillers at the ready and have been known to rely a little too much on nachos as a dinner option. However, Oscar Mayer Fast Franks go one step further by eliminating one of the overwhelming two steps involved in making a hot dog. These hot dogs come packaged individually nestled in their own bun. That's right, you can now save yourself 20 seconds of time by eliminating that pesky task of opening a package of hot dog buns. Whew! A time saver indeed.

On a serious note, this highlights a concept that I was reading about regarding the food industry's ability to make profits. The main point was that food companies make more money by providing a service than by actually selling foods. For example, cut lettuce or onions cost more than a head of lettuce or an individual onion. Likewise, when you buy Fast Franks, you are not just paying for a hot dog and bun, you are also paying for the service of having the hot dog already placed inside the bun. I'm impressed that Oscar Mayer could actually come up with a way to insert service into a meal that requires such little effort and, thus, has little room for service. Perhaps next they will be offering us individually wrapped slices of toast.